I went to a nearby podunk town today, to shop at the mall. I had to drive to this neighboring podunk town, because the town I live in, although roughly the same size, is even more podunk in the fact that they don't have a mall. They don't even have a Wal-Mart, although one is coming... Now, I've only been further than the JC Penney in this mall once before, and even then I didn't walk all the way to the end. The only other stores I've been in are the Hallmark and the Waldenbooks. But today as I was walking I noticed a store I hadn't seen before. There were two words in the store name, and as I got closer I could definitely see the first word was "Urban." As I got closer I could make out a little more of the word below it. "Okay," I thought, "I see an O..." I got closer. "There's a U..." A little closer. "A T... OH MY GOSH DOES THIS DINKY LITTLE MALL IN A PODUNK TOWN HAVE AN URBAN OUTFITTERS?!?!?" I was in a state of disbelief. I am a fan of some of the things that one can buy from an Urban Outfitters. My pace quickened. There was a bounce in my step. I was extremely excited that there was an Urban Outfitters in this mall, regardless of the small voice of doubt still festering inside me. I got closer and finally I could figure out the second word: OUTLET. There was a store called Urban Outlet. And it was a stupid store for teeny bopper girls who think they're all cool and ghetto. HELLO! You live in small town Illinois!! You are by no means ghetto. Even if you shop at a store that claims to be URBAN, in a town of about 15,000 there is nothing urban about it. So there! They may have fooled me into getting excited at the prospect of an Urban Outfitters, but I SO totally put them in their place.
I was totally the winner in this instance.