I was innocently sitting in my office this morning, trying to finalize arrangements for our young adult bowling this weekend (which is a story in and of itself) when I received the phone call. Part of me knew it was probably inevitable that I would receive this call. Part of me was a bit hopeful that I wouldn't. But I did. Here is a transcript of that phone call, with perhaps a bit of artistic license...
Me: This is Mark.
Caller: Hi this is [Vacation Bible School Coordinator]!
Me: Hi VBS Coordinator! How are you!
Caller: I'm good. I have a quick question for you.
Caller: VBS is next week...
Caller: What would you like to do?
Me: Well, what do you need? (I know, I know... I walked into it. I deserve it.)
Caller: Well, I've been doing some calling around and have been unable to come up with a clown. Since the theme is Davey and Goliath's Circus Extravaganza, we thought we needed a clown.
***To make a long story short, I was asked to be a clown for Vacation Bible School next week. Lacking the ability to say no, I said yes. I also offered to call a couple of the older youth to see if they'd be willing to be clowns, as well. I have one high school girl who has already agreed. Seeing as how her hair is already a dark shade of pink, and she wears bright green colored clothes a lot, I figured she'd be a natural person to ask. I have a list of some others to call, but have not yet done that. Except one. But she wasn't home.
So, I think I might go to some thrift stores to find a sufficient clown ensemble. I used to be a clown every year for halloween when I was younger, but now that stuff has either been thrown away or would be much too small. I would love to get a clown wig, but seeing as how I don't have that much notice, that is sort of out of the picture. And my podunk little town is not big enough to have anywhere that would sell that stuff year round, like a costume shop or whatnot. So, we'll have to see what I can find.
Okay, so I make it sound like it will be some sort of inconvenience to be a clown all next week. But anyone who really knows me knows that I was born for that sort of thing, and that even though I might pretend to not want to be doing it, it makes my day to think about spending a good part of next week as a clown.
Although, to be truthful, I find clowns a bit unsettling. What with Stephen King's IT and the real life story of John Wayne Gacy, and then the multitude of scary clown dolls and figurines... Clowns are a bit frightening. I suppose it might be different if I am the clown, though.
So yeah. Just call me Bozo the Pastor Intern. At least for the next week.